7 YR OLD: So, Mum. Whatever party you vote for, do you get a party-bag at the end of it? ME: No. Sadly not. 7 YR OLD: So why would you bother? ME: Dunno. Ask Russell Brand. 10 YR OLD: Is he the one what killed ‘Evita’? His photo-painting thing is everywhere. ME: I’m sure […]
Roald Dahl, Scottish Independence and Terrorist Infants
Daughter (10): It’s Roald Dahl’s birthday today Me: (distracted, as per usual): Sorry? Daughter: Yeah. I always remember it because it’s between my birthday and yours. And we were all told about this at school. IT’S ROALD DAHL’S BIRTHDAY THIS WEEKEND. Like …. it was the Queen’s birthday or summat! But way better. Obviously. Because […]