Pondering the return to school with son (aged 12): SON: “I’m really hoping that we get to wear masks at school. In the corridors and that.”ME: “Why? That won’t be much fun”SON: “Actually it will, because I’ll be able to mouth ‘Eff-off’ to the really nasty kids. And I won’t get my head kicked in.” […]
In all Innocence
Me and husband in the kitchen.ME: Oooh, I’ve really pulled a muscle in me bum. Can you just like, pummel it really hard?HIM: (resignedly) Oh, if I must.CHILD’S VOICE (from the lounge): WILL YOU PLEASE KEEP THE JOYS OF YOUR MARRIED LIFE TO YOURSELVES?!
Freaky School for the Newbies
I was having a bit of a moan to my son, about the fact that he’d only had 24 weeks of teaching during his first year at high school. And that this had been pretty crap for his sister too, as she’s about to start her final GCSE year. He said that he was quite […]
Nay to Staycation. Aye to Wakes-cation
Enough of the ‘Staycation’ rubbish! If we’re lucky enough to get a bit of time off this summer, let’s resurrect the term that northerners always used for their week off. This was the time when the cotton and woollen mills closed en masse – when entire towns – like my home-town of Stalybridge – were […]
Mucky Puppy
My lad (aged 12) decided it was high time to cheer himself up – after 21 weeks of no contact with chums, none of the usual little joys etc. Now, I know that this isn’t a ‘necessary’ purchase, but given all of the misery around us – the purchase of a small, raspberry flavoured Slush […]
Best of the North
My son asked me what my favourite jokes were. Obviously there are far too many to mention (joke in itself … I rarely remember actual jokes) but two sprang to mind. And they’re both excellent examples of northern comedians’ ability to grab their multi-cultural surroundings and to celebrate it – in humour that brings folk […]
- « Previous Page
- 1
- …
- 7
- 8
- 9
- 10
- 11
- …
- 41
- Next Page »