SON: Mum, are you driving me to school this morning?
ME: Nope. Petrol shortage. Crisis thing.
SON: Oh. Don’t we use gas in our car?
ME: Don’t be ridiculous. And I also wish you’d stop saying things like ‘taking out the trash’ and ‘oh, look at the leaves, it’s Fall already’ and ‘I was on the sidewalk’ and ‘when are we going on vacation?’
SON: Alright, alright, it’s not my fault that you live in some weird Victorian England time warp. If you had your way, you’d have me up a chimney or down a mine.
ME: And you can forget about a lift home now.
SON: Godamnit.
ME: Oi! Watch it!
SON: Sorry. I mean ‘Curses, forsooth.’
Loved it,